The Sea Captain
“I do!” He
deadpanned.
“You’ve been
deposed!” I responded.
It was over, I nodded
to the commission, and walked out. Out in the hallway I felt a little yen for
nicotine, but it passed as quickly as it came when that same guy came out and, said:
“Well done buddy,” as
he heartily shook my hand.
“Next time, call me
direct, and we’ll work something out.”
Out in the car I
called Mary, and gave her a rundown,
“Well next time yar
our guy, dude…ya got it.”
“Never say neigh,” I
answered, and hung up as I heard her crack up again over the old lady saying,
“Waise ya wite hand…ya na ya cain’t lie.”
That was probably my
smoothest and coolest deed, but I had one that made me feel as if I were James Bond. It was out on a barge, in the
middle of the night. I got a call the day before one Thanksgiving, for a signing out
at College point. They had to do the signing that day, or the borrowers would
have had to wait another month or more to
get badly needed funds.
“Oh please ya gotta do
diz one for me,” she begged.
I was really busy,
and didn’t want to do it. Apparently so was every other agent, so they offered
me a buck and a quarter. They promised it would be quick, I agreed. The borrower was a barge captain, who was traveling
down the Hudson river at the time, and promised to be in the area by two in the
afternoon. At three o’clock still no barge. At four, I had to attend mass with my
family, still no barge. I called the agency.
“I can’t do this till
after 5:30,” I says.
“Why?’
“I will be in church
with my family, you won’t be able to reach me.”
“Why!”
“No Cell phones in
church,” I says.
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