Day CCXCI

Funny Guy?

      “Ditcha go see a quack, man?”

      “Dem mofoes be spensive, man. I don’t has no medicah, yo.”

      “How bouda moigency room?”

      “They asks too many freaking questions, dude, get in ya poisonal life an sheet. I’m just sick, let em gimme some meds be wa they needs tadoo, ya na.”

     “Looky hea dude, da be a clinic down da way a bit, they be like a community thang, and so they ain’t so spensive, man. If ya likes I kin takes ya da. They’ll look at ya, mebbe stick they fingah up ya ass, an sheet too, ya na.” I smiled.

     He gave be nasty look like he wanted to kick my ass, and said:

     “Looky hea man, I ain’t one adem freaking funny dudes, ya na. Ain’t nobody gon put nathan up my ass, ya dig? I look funny ta you an sheet, man?”

      I really wanted to laugh my ass off, but he was dead serious, and I didn’t want to lose a pal, and a customer, so I just smiled and said,

     “Look Gus, ain’t nathan bout being funny man, they jes…lookey hea, whens da last time ya don seen a quack, man?”

     “When I wuz a liddle kid I guess, an mama tookit me.”

     “Ya a grown man, dude. Ya needs take cah a yasef, man. You cuds has some nasty shit in ya, ya best go see somebody!”

     “I cain’t jest leave da stoh, man.” He said as he lit the fourth or fifth butt since I walked into the store.