Day LXX

Da Hero

     “Yup, yeash indee d d d Deee E, deeee one, and ony! Yea man, I hate his ass. I knew he was drunk. He was ova da yapping about his freaking karate, and shit. Ya na like he always does. I was getting tired a his jive ass shit, man. It was about closing time, so I left. There were like four or five of us, and he was alone. Like he always is, ya na. He don’t trust nobody, man. Anyway, I left, and when I was about halfway home. It hit me, man. It just nagged at me, all his bullshit an all, ya na. So I stepped outa da path, ina da grass, an waited for his fat ass. I turned off my flashlight, so he wouldn’t see me, and waited. It seemed like I was in da fo eva, man…a long, long assss time ina dark. But da thunk of cold coking his facking ass, well it made me smile. Hell, man I almost cracked up, and gave myself away. I had to keep telling myself to be cool, man, be cool, ya na. At last he shows up. The tough guy didn’t have a flashlight, but I could see da red emba of his butt moving up, and down in the dahk as he walked, you know. Soooo, I set myself up, and when he gots close, I jumped outa da grass, swinging diz hea ahtilariee, my mighty canon, man.”

   He said it, as he curled his right bicep, and continued.

     “Kapow, man. He didn’t neva na wat hit him, dude. Doya dig me, man!”

     I nodded my head, and smiled: “Damn, an am again Dan, you’re a freaking hero, man! It was because adet shit they moved da pool table ova ta da barracks. Youse a bonafide H E RO, dudio!”